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Thursday, February 28, 2008

A little story...

This is a little story I got today in an email and I thought that this would be a nice item to share with everyone. Unfortunately the author is unknown or else I'd give him proper acknowledgement for his writing because this is certainly no attempt at plagiarism. It goes like this...

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, she had lost my heart to a lovely girl called Dew. I didn't love her anymore..I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I did'nt have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a months time and she did'nt want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes
and said softly, don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realised she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me, .. she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realise that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote:

I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

The small details of our lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property , the money in the bank, blah..blah..blah. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you, but if you do, you just might save a marriage.

- Author unknown -

I actually received this story from a friend who is now divorced and that's what moved me to post it. We all know that not always do things go back to the way they began. Each person has their own reasons for doing something like this and each time the outcome can be different.
What do you think?

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Wordless Wednessday

Daddy...

look at me...

All gone!!


Meanwhile at home I have to pore over all these books!!
THis is only for one of the subjects mind you!!

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy Valentine's Day

My Valentine's
As most of you prepare to celebrate Valentine's Day in your own special ways I'd like to share this little story with you that I received from a friend today...

Why God created children

Whenever your children are/were out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said was "DON'T!"

"Don't what?" Adam replied.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.

"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve...we have forbidden fruit!!!!!"

"No Way!"

"Yes, way!"

"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God

"Why"

"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why he hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few minutes later, God saw his children having an apple break and He was ticked!

"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.

"Uh huh," Adam replied.

"Then why did you?" said the Father.

"I don't know," said Eve.

"She started it!" Adam said

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"DID NOT!"

Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.

BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!

1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.

2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own
children.

3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.

4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.

6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.

ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day.

AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:

"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"


What do you think?




Happy Valentine's Day!!

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Happy Chinese New Year!


GONG XI FA CHAI!!

Wishing all my Chinese friends a Happy and Prosperous Year of the Rat!!

GongXi GongXi!!

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Bruises, Bumps, Coughs and Colds!

What am I talking about? Well its my little girl again. She hasn't been well all of last week...firstly last Sunday night she developed a fever that kept us up at nights sponging her to keep her cool. Well it was more like having to give her cold showers becuase after a while she didn't want to be anywhere near the cold damp cloth we were using. Surprisingly, the fever went away by Wednesday night. We thought that we were out of the woods.

On thursday after work we let her play with her slide and was kinda happy to have her back. However, that night out of nowhere, she got a sore throat and cough. More sleepless nights for her and us because everytime she would get a bout of coughing, we'd wake up. We figured that it must have been why she had the fever. Anyway, it was a nasty cough so yesterday we took her to see her paeditrician and got a whole lot of medication. Things seemed to subside a little and we all enjoyed a nice long nap in the afternoon...well deserved under the circumstances.



Later my good buddy Sean came by with his wife for a little visit. It's his birthday today so we went out for a little pre-celebration dinner and took the little one with us...all wrapped up and cosy. We wanted to try the German bierhaus in the Curve but it was packed solid. Probably because Chinese new Year is almost here aand lotsa folks are oout shopping. So we headed to our favourite joint, Tony Roma's which is within walking distance. TR's was packed too and we were told that it might be a 30 minute wait. DOH...what do you expect on a Saturday night. However they did ask us if we wanted to sit outside where they have alfresco dining. It wasn't very popular last night because it was raining a little so we took a look and found that it was cozier outside not as stuffy as inside because of the crowd.


We were all so hungry after waiting that we ordered too much food. Moreover the portions were large and we struggled a little to finish but eventually did. Burp! Anyway after dinner we were in a joyouds mood and sang Chinese New Year songs all the way home! Well we only knew one song and kept singing the same song!! LOL Even Ellie chimed in...of course she wanted to sing "Jingle Bells"!!
Anyway after we got home we watched a little tv and drank coffee...and this is when I took my eye off Ellie for a second when I heard a loud thump and saw her on the floor. Initially she was quiet and then she started bawling her little eyes out. The bump formed quickly!! Gave us a little scare and while we put ice to keep the swelling down it was has to console her. Usually I'd jsut tell her get up and continue playing but this time I was a little concerned but I think she's okay now. You can see the bump below...it's subsided a lot from last night!
I really wished that I had put wooden floors like I had wanted to for a long time. The impact would have been so much less painful. Unfortunately everytime I start thinking about it I end up planning to change the look of the whole place. I really need to get some Home Decor ideas and actually did find a nice place that has Interior Design Ideas. This will be very helpful to me to make up my mind on the actual style I want. I'm tired of the old house look. I want some new ideas and maybe a new theme like the European Decors I saw. I usually get my stuff from a certain blue and yellow Swedish furniture store anyway. Hey the meatballs are great!!